Day 325: When Self Realizations don't fill Our Words, yet.

I have had the most interesting experience since writing my yesterday blog on Self Forgiveness.

That blog was a result of a moment that I shared with someone who has actually self realized Self Forgiveness as a living expression of himself and so the experience I had was the result of riding on someone's words, until the words filled me with the experience itself. 

I know I got it because I spent a few moments in and as this realization and I could perceive it as if it was my own, I touched this Creation for a moment and the Creation and myself were One.

And as I sat down to write the words that would contain this experience, I know I did my best to line them up to deliver the experience itself again and it took me some time, because they were not lined up right, I could feel the experience becoming elusive as I tried to frame it within my words and so I had to adjust them, mold them until I tried to bend them to do what I wanted, which was to put this experience into them, force it there, so they could carry it for myself and deliver it to others as One.

But when I read my post, as I still had the memory of the experience  I saw that the 'word' was not there, my words were not full enough yet, they did not contain THAT specific experience that I lived for a moment as me, where I saw the utter Beauty of that One Point in the midst of the confusion we live in, the noise that goes on in our Minds that never leaves enough space for words to be filled by me, as me, and so I experienced the frustration of being unable to replicate the moment as I lived it, specifically because it was not delivered to me in any grand way, wearing white robes or with cherubs playing the harp, there was no speaking in tongues, there was no touch, no no, instead it was given to me in utter simplicity, through living words that carried the experience within themselves because the person that spoke them and his words, were/are One.

So, today, I am just writing a note to Self, to remind myself that filling all the words I have used so far in separation as the Mind as Energy, is a process, that will flourish with accumulation of me as my words filling them one Breath at the time, returning to them myself as Life as One, so I will no longer be separate from them and when I shall will myself to speak or write to make something clear for myself and others, equally, they won't be just partially filled with me, but they will be me, as One, and then my word can become the Living Word, as I live as my words, as One, no longer indulging in separation from myself as words seeking to experience myself in-dividua-lly but experiencing myself as One with myself and Existence in every moment of Breath.

So now I have a yardstick, I have been gifted this experience as a measure to align myself to and I am enormously grateful for it and within this, here is my self realization for today of the why we work on Words at Desteni: because my words, our words don't yet contain ME/US, they are crapped up with stuff, emotions and feelings, memories, opinions, they are biased, I downloaded a whole biased vocabulary from those that came before me and then I went out and lived it as me.

I am still a carrier of duality for now, my words are dis-eased and so my words are still blanks and this is why when I use my words sometimes I can't hit the target as the delivery of a point in such an unbiased way that the other can zone in and get it, as I experienced it for myself, beyond any reasonable doubt, hence they are for me to fill with Meaning in alignment to What is Best for All and this is how I will return Me-aning to my words as myself, as One.

So the process we are walking is to empty our words, with Self Forgiveness and then design the new words (which is what Self Creation is all about) with our self corrective statements and word redefinition, so that my words carry the meaning I have put into them as mySelf and not someone else's meaning, so that my words and I become One and then finally I'll be able to do My Living and stop doing Someone Else's instead.

Clearing Words is a Process, find out how it works at Desteni, go on, get yourself a Life.

Related articles

• Day 320: Spoilt Words - Spoil Worth
• Day 324: Desteni Witness - The 'Scam' and Secret of Self Forgiveness
• 211: ImPosing My Mess (Mind) on Others
• Day 45: I Testify - Here is My Witness-Statement
• 369. Desteni: An Insider's Report

Day 236: Self Destruction is NOT Such a Pretty Little Thing

This is a follow up to my post Self Destruct Program - What if you Survive It.

When and as I see myself moving or starting to move into a sense of boredom, uselessness, impatience and any other emotion I have identified as triggers to my Self Destruct Programs, I stop, Breathe, Breathe, Breathe, bring myself back here in and as the Physical into and as stability

When and as I see myself desiring to engage triggers that I know will lead me to activate my Self destruct Character, I stop, breathe, check what is happening inside of me that makes me desire to move into Self destruction and if I can, write down what I am experiencing to release myself from the energetic movement, and if I cannot I stick to Breathe until I am able to write down my experience and apply self forgiveness

When and as I see myself imagining or moving into imagining how much better a Self destructive activity/habit would  be to anything that I am doing in the moment, I stop, breathe, do not allow myself to wander off into imagining things that aren't real and that I have proved to myself only carry an imaginary 'energetic reward', instead I push myself to remain here in and as breath until I have breathed through my desire to get off on my imagination to not be Here but off in and as my Mind

When and as I see myself wandering off  or about to wander off in my Mind through Mine Fields of thoughts that I know will lead me to this experience of myself as not enough, as if something should be added to it such as food or sweets, I stop, breathe, remind myself that I know where those thoughts lead to and that I have no need to go and check them out and push myself to stabilize myself through breath instead of suppressing myself through one of my self destructive habits

When and as I see myself moving or about to move into memories of my past failures concerning changing habits, I stop, breathe as I see realize and understand that what I have lived is not who I am and that what I lived cannot define who I am unless I give my power as directive principle away to my mind and I commit myself to not give my power away to memories of my past failures no matter how specific they seem to be to the moment I am facing

When and as I see myself reacting to my friends with chronic illnesses as I pull up the belief that it should have been me, I stop, breathe, forgive myself for desiring to punish myself for how I have lived and keep doing so until I no longer resonate with this desire for suffering and self destruction

When and as I see myself  doubting my ability to change, I stop, breathe, make the self directive decision to not accept the doubt that I can change in and as me just because I participated in this doubt and then in the con-vinction that people don't change in the past, as I See, realize and understand that the past is past and cannot define me as I stand as self directive principle to change myself to realign myself to Oneness and Equality and what is best for all, for myself and all of existence, Equal and One

When and as I see myself attempting to move into any of the above behavior, I stop, breathe, see realize and understand that, since I already know the outcome, I am attempting to find an excuse to go back to what I find familiar, as in a family legacy, see realize and understand that a legacy is a tie to myself as a Character that I no longer want to participate in, and that I have the power to step out of it through a process of accumulation of Not participating in any of the triggers leading to Self Destruction.

I commit myself to keep writing about Habits and the desire to engage them until I stand clear in and as The Change that I am scripting for myself.

Related articles

• Day 235: Self Destruct Program - What if You survive It?
• Day 234: Who is Screwing with my Memories?
• Day 127 - I Cannot Hide From Myself
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Day 156: Stopping the Good and Bad News of Who I am

When and as I see myself reacting to something I am reading, I stop, breathe, realize that everything that exists is in fact coming from the same substance and what I react to is just a point from which I have separated myself from or wish to separate myself from, instead I see realize and understand that my participation in feelings and emotions is just a point I use to experience myself as energy and so I stop through breathing until I no longer have reactions within me as me

When and as I see myself not wanting to read a news because 'it's just too much', I stop, breathe, see and realize that I am not reading news to participate in negative emotions that prove that I am Good because 'I feel bad' about it, I am reading the news to expand myself to include everything that exists as me, beyond labels of good or bad, beautiful or ugly, right or wrong, and that whatever I see outward that is not in fact supporting Life as what is best for All, I can seek it inside of myself to self correct to realign myself to Oneness and Equality and What is Best for All

When and as I see myself discounting 'breathing' because I'm too busy holding my breath to get through some of the horror news of our times, I stop, breathe, breathe, breathe, remind myself that I am moving into an energetic experience that I use to justify why I am breathless, I can instead stop myself and breathe as a self willed act of self support, until I no longer feel friction or separation regarding what I am reading, which is but a consequence of how we created this reality from fear and self interest and why we are standing to correct ourselves

When and as I see myself wanting to 'take a step away from an event' to underline how I could have never done that', about what I am reading and the person who did it to which I feel superior, better then, I stop, breathe, realize that as The Mind I was just luckier to not have the same life experiences and genes that would take on such extremes, but I have gone to extremes in my mind and the fact that I didn't get to play them out doesn't make me better than anyone who did as the pressure valves of existence, just Equal in the Mind fuckupedness that we are standing to self correct, take self responsibility for and leave behind for good

When and as I see myself wanting to judge myself as 'bringer of bad news' meaning something that may make someone sad vs a news that may make someone happy, I see realize and understand that what I am doing is supporting their mind as feelings and emotions, as positivity vs negativity, so I too can get to feel rewarded with a positive experience of myself as being good vs being bad for being the supporter of 'good experiences/feelings' and not the party pooper depressing 'in touch with reality' one

I commit myself to finding the points within me where I have separated reality through morality of good and bad, right and wrong, leading to judgements of what is in separation from myself and to correct myself by deleting my 'stances' as opinions and judgements so that I can walk this creation as one in and as breath and not as a reactive tool of The Mind

I commit myself to, when and as I see myself reaching or about to reach the 'enough already' point, o stand up, breathe, bring myself back to the physical, realize I have gone lost into the Mind or I could not be approaching the 'enough already' point in any give moment and keep breathing until I am back here in and as breath, no longer reacting

I commit myself to stop dividing news into good/positive news and bad/negative news, as this is an energetic classification of how I experience myself when I do read or engage in something and is based on the stored information I live as me which are charged and divided by my own definitions in 'what is good and what is bad which will give me an experience of either positive or negative, both of which are not real and not representing what is in fact here in the Physical as a point that simply needs my self correction about my judgements/opinion/idea/charge, that I need to investigate to equalize myself to

I commit myself to stop judging myself for speaking the common sense of what is best for all, which is not something just grandiose such as feed everyone, but each situation, point, moment as an expression of myself has a 'Best for All' moment, and I commit myself to find it and simply express it as me within the simplicity of Breath as me as self expression.

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Day 142: I'll name My Price All Right!

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that only the things I don't enjoy doing should be paid, because if I am enjoying myself I am not Really working and I should not be paid for what I do

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that working must be a nuisance that we pretend to do as I have associate my grandma taking naps when she was working at home in the afternoon and asking me to 'lie about it' if her boss should call during nap time, with 'working' and what working is as something we should  default and rather take a nap, on the preference list of things to do

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, since I had negative judgements about napping because I was always forced in kindergarten and elementary school to take a nap, and even when I said "I don't want to", "I am not tired", I would be asked to lie down close my eyes and 'rest' and therefore turned napping into the ultimate waste of time and life, to then when I associated napping to being better than working, perceive work as something that I must dislike MORE than napping and therefore every time I enjoyed what did I could not  call it working and I should in fact, not be paid for it

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that it was awkward that my mum would want to pay me for doing things I would have done for free, like swapping winter and summer closets at the end of the seasons because I had a neat and organized mind to carry out such works and enjoyed doing it, while she was attempting to teach me that what we do must be paid for, because this is how we sustain ourselves in this Money based world and yet every time I enjoyed what I was doing, I felt awkward to be paid for it

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe I am strange because I actually enjoy everything I do once I start doing it, even caring for a home or cleaning but because I always had to justify why people paid me to do what I did, I started to pretend that working was hard and all consuming like it seemed for everyone else around me who talked and nagged about it

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel guilty when I enjoy something I am doing and I am paid for, because I believe that 'to be honest' I should not enjoy what I am doing since this is the reason why people are paying me and others for, to do what we don't enjoy doing, and that it is dishonest to in fact enjoy myself when I am paid to NOT enjoy myself because this is what work is

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that when I am asked to 'Name my Price' I have to be careful to not ask too much because I could end up not doing what I enjoy doing, which is more or less everything and I have to be careful to not ask too much in case people resent my request and don't allow me to do what I enjoy doing for money

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to associate 'name your price' to prostitution, because this was the first mention on "women selling themselves" that I heard, which I have associated to everything I do for money that I would happily do for free but I can't because I need the money to live now, and so I have to reconcile with this work/money point because is a limitation that I am imposing on myself just because of a few oddities I have picked up along the way that I can let go to realign myself to be an effective human being within the system to do what is best for me as best for All as in overcoming my self imposed limitations

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, since I associated women on sale to being a bad thing as in prostitution, to not want and resist 'selling myself' for a job, instead of seeing and realizing that it was me judging and defining working as 'selling myself' and not as putting my labor in the system for money for now and then I will do the same for What is Best for All when the New System will allow it

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge prostitution as 'bad' because I picked up on the raised eyebrows, judgements and resistance of people around me talking about it, instead of seeing that prostitution is in fact a very honest job, since it's the only job in which someone sells what they really own that has not been manufactured through slave/children labour or other abusive means and that the only thing that makes it unfortunate is that it is not a choice job as it is not chosen but is the last resort of women who have been left at the fringe of society without entry to the Money system that sell their body, because honestly, who would like to sell their body if one would have enough to live and provide for their family?

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist "selling myself" in an attempt to not prostitute myself to this system of abuse, failing to see that at the moment we are all prostituting ourselves to live, because we have made this planet into a living Hell where Life is for Sale and no Life is for Free at the moment, not even the Elite's because they are enslaved to this system of Fear just as much as we are, as We Fear for our own survival and they Fear to lose what they have and have to Fear for their own survival

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to not have to 'name my price' but instead to have my price named for me, even though, due to my desire to NOT take responsibility for myself I had to face many times the point that no one can put my interest before theirs in a system of survival and that I myself do not put their interest before mine when I refuse to Name my price, I am just hoping that they will name a price High Enough for Me to be happy with so I won't have to face the point of 'naming my price' and how I experience myself within this point

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel disappointed when people 'named my price' and the price was too low and I felt devalued by their low offer for the price of me, because I have accepted and allowed myself to associate my worth to the amount of Money I can make/ earn as a 'living' in separation from myself as Self Worth, instead of seeing the simple point of giving a service/work I get paid for that has nothing to do with my worth or my value

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that 'living' means making money, because if I have to 'earn a living' than my living is equal and one to the amount of money I earn, instead of seeing and realizing no one can make a 'living' because we are already Alive, we are just going out to get the money we need to function within this system because it's practical and it's part of the self support we owe to ourselves in this Money based system that we now have to walk as the consequences of all the other stupid decision we made through eons of time that led us here

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imprint myself with all the 'make a living' bullshit that my family passed on to me, as a point of value I should seek for myself, instead of seeing and realizing that they were just passing on their fears that if I were not to become effective within the system I would not be able to live because we have turned this world into a Live or Let Die place, where Life is for Sale but we never want to just spell that point out right, because we fear to have to face what we created of this world so much, that we pass on the 7th generations fears to the children to teach them to fear the system and not being able to live without 'making a living', as none of these Fears have been resolved and transcended by the children caretakers themselves but just passed on through words of 'parental add-vice'

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, when asked to name my price, feel a tightening in my solar plexus, stop breathing as my mind jumps into all directions while I try to compare myself to what is available on the market, to who is asking, how much they can pay and how I should ask for it, instead of breathing and just stating my price that I believe to be fair for the excellent work that I know I can do, stopping seeking justifications through comparison to why I should be paid so much, because when I do I start the fault finding game to prove to myself that I am better/superior/more than others and that is why I deserve MORE than them

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to justify how much I think is a fair price and the price I want for the work/service I give instead of seeing and realizing that if I have to justify myself is because I have doubts about deserving that amount for what I do, and that I always then FEAR that, since I cannot even justify to myself why I should earn more than another, because I went into the comparison game looking for reasons as to why the price I want to ask is right, and within that discovered many are paid much less and so somehow instead of seeing and realizing that is because we are all playing this game to the bottom trying to secure a job for ourselves out of fear of survival, that we have reduced the market place to a place where we are happy to take on slave jobs for nothing as we believe we have 'outsmarted' the competition by asking less, instead of all of us being Value Worth conscious as Self Value and Self Worth and holding our ground for what we are worth, which would have given birth to a complete different working game and not the slavery game we are now facing as the consequence of outsmarting each other in a race to the bottom

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I cannot 'name my price', and that I must be ashamed of the price I want to ask and who do I think I am wanting to be paid more than another, and yet if I did not compare myself to another and just asked what I saw as fair for what I do as a work or a service, I would not go through shame or guilt as I would be doing my own thing as what is best for All, because is certainly NOT best for All to race each other to the bottom, but would be best for All to see that we are worthy of good wages and a job we enjoy doing, otherwise we are becoming by our own doing the slave force of this capitalistic System, without even realizing we got where we got through our own fears and our own doing

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, when I am asked to 'name my price', move into fear, that godonlyknows, what if I name the 'wrongprice' as if there is such a thing as a wrong price and not just a price I have set, which is not wrong or right, and it doesn't become wrong even when someone refuses my request, it's just not a match to the budget they had for the position they wished to cover

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resent men who were paid more than me, double than me and for secretly backchatting them to diminish them in my eyes, so I would not have to feel the experience of diminishment and of being worthless by comparison, instead of seeing and realizing that I never resented others but just myself for having 'named my price' so cheap just because I had hang ups about naming a Fair Price for what I do as work or services

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that if I don't get the price I want, I am worthless because, since I associated my worth and value with the money I can generate as a 'living' when my price is not met it means I do not have that worth and value any longer and now I have to go and seek value for myself somewhere else, which is one of the reasons why I dislike naming my price, instead of seeing and realizing that meeting my price has many factors attached to it that have nothing to do with me or my self worth and value, unless I give it up and invest my worth and value into an 'idea of Worth and value that is translated into a money number' that when is not met leaves me feeling worthless

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that my work is priceless, which is in fact what happens when I am asked to name my price 'I am Price-less' as I believe my work is superior in every possible way due to the way my mind processes information and the work flow of operations in sequences of priorities that are unmatched by the people I have worked with so far, and yet wanting to be Price-less leaves me without a price to name when I am asked to name a price, which then leaves me feeling Worth-less as I tumble down from the Priceless Podium on which I had built myself within comparison and competition to the worthlessness of being Price-Less as Worth-Less

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that in a World where everything has a Price, being Price-Less is associated in my Mind with being Worth-Less, as I lack the Price tag to define me and place me where the system believes and insists I belong according to my Price Tag, which I am the Only One to name, and so as I accepted and allowed myself to believe it was the system allocating me, this was not true, it was me through my acceptance and allowance of my Worth as Price, which is why I resisted to 'name My price' in Fear that once I named it I was fucked into some system layers from which I would never be able to escape, failing to see I was the one doing the whole Role Playing as I sought for my worth and value outside of myself in separation from myself as the Price tag I did not want to name just out of FEAR

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to FEAR naming my Price, in Fear of my own definition of Myself and what I believed and though 'I was really Worth', instead of seeing and realizing I feared naming my price because I feared seeing that I had misplaced my Value and Worth onto a price Tag that I did not want to Name to Not see what is the worth and Value of me, according to ME

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that unless I am Price-Less, I am Worth-Less and yet the conundrum is quite clear, do I have a price for my work and services or not? Because if I am Price-Less then I Have to Work for Free, and yet I see realize and understand that this is NOT possible within this physical reality at the moment in the way things are set up, so I better pull myself together, stop being Price-Less so I can 'Name My Price' and be content with it when I engage in a new job or in giving a service/work for which I have clearly within myself set a Price for

When and as I see myself being asked to Name My Price and I feel the tightening in the solar plexus, I stop, breathe, remind myself that if I had not anticipated being asked and if I don't know what is offered and required of me it is acceptable to ask what would my services/work entail and then decide what price I am content with that I see as fair for myself, stopping to worry about If They will see it as fair as they will have their own responsibility to see what they can afford for what they are asking for and I have to see what I am willing to do for what price and without comparison to anything else, state My price

When and as I see myself trying to move into the Mind to find reasons why what I ask is fair, which is the step before I move into Comparison and Competition and attempt to bring everyone down to justify my higher worth and value, I stop, breathe, remind myself I no longer want to participate in comparison and competition and that My Price is not dependent on Comparison and Competition but on what I am willing to do for what price, without on the spot or later go comparing myself to other wages just to feel diminished if I discover someone earns more than me as in 'they are more valuable than me'

When and as I see myself desiring to compare 'values and worth' with others in the same business or in the same company, hoping to come out the winner, I stop, breathe, remind myself what a losing game comparison and competition is and I keep walking my self directive decision in self responsibility for the choices I made and the Price I myself named for my work and services

I commit myself to stop the comparison and competition game regarding the point of 'naming my price' as it is ME naming My price and so there is none else responsible for what I name as my Price once I am offered a job or required a service

I commit myself to assess what a job or a service entails before I Name my Price, so that a clear communication is exchanged about my potential role and the Money I ask for it, to avoid further misunderstanding or tensions down the line once I make a decision

I commit myself to walk my decision in self honesty and self responsibility, stopping the blame of others for having what I did not have the guts to ask for, and instead ask for what I want to have that I see as the fair price for the services and job I have been requested or offered

Related articles

• Day 88: Capitalism vs Socialism?
• Day 92: I Have to take care of MY People
• Day 93: Grey Populations and Hopes for Peace in Old Age going Dark
• 142. The Money Security-Bubble
• Day 142: Money and True Activism
• Day 145: Labor and Slavery
• Day 149: ACCUMULATION SECRETS of WEALTH
• Day 141: Name Your Price, Babe

Day 128: Committing to stopping Justifications as The Justifier Character

I commit myself to stop justifying myself when I perceive I have done something ''wrong' instead I remind myself that when I feel the need to justify myself is because I am aware in Self Honesty that what I have done is not What is Best for All, but I do not give into Self Blame or into Blaming others as a justification for my behavior, instead I investigate why and how I have done what I did, as everything I do as a Character is based on Fear, as this is the only reason Why Characters exist, so that I won't walk the same path next time I am faced with the same situation and I STOP the opportunity to step into the Justifier

I commit myself to stop my fear of judgement of others which is the Fear of the judgement of me whenever I do something that I perceive as wrong, which I can flag for myself whenever I see the desire to step into the Justifier again,, so I can dig into the Whys and Hows to stop this desire to justify myself in fear of my/others judgement

I commit myself to stop projecting myself in future scenarios of disasters, in which I start to Fear the Consequences of what I have done through elaborate visualization of the possible worse, as I saw that this makes my desire to justify myself in the light of something that has not yet happened and may never happen such as what happened yesterday with these two friends that today I discovered was all my fear projected into the Worse Possible scenario, that made me desire to Justify myself in advance

I commit myself to see the Common sense of being Here in and as Breath, as I have seen realized and understood that it is only when I am into Character Hopping that I experience fears and the desire to Justify Myself for what I believe and perceive I have done wrong, instead of just being here in and as Breath and Not accepting to take the rollercoaster ride that the Mind offers under the justification 'that is better be prepared for the Worse'

I commit myself to stop believing that it is better to be prepared for the Worse, as I have seen first hand how many times the worse did not come when I expected it and so I just wasted Time and Breaths lost within the Mind, scaring myself instead of consistently applying myself to become more stable Here in and as Breath

 

I commit myself to stop scaring myself as I see, realize and understand that every time I am scared, I am not Here, because if I were Here I would not be scared, as fear exists only within and as the Mind and that it just takes my determination and the deliberate Self Directed decision to say NO I do not accept this experience as Me and Breathe, to stop the fearmonger I have become and turned this outward world into, Equal and One

I commit myself to show others that fear is Not real, that it is a fabrication of The Mind that is fed to us by the World Systems as much as We feed it to ourselves, without mercy, non stop, no matter the manifested evident consequences of Our Lives lived in fear and separation showing us how much we need to Stop and bring ourselves back here to deal with this Physical Manifested Existence and realign ourselves inward and outward to Oneness and Equality and What is Best for All

I commit myself to remind myself whenever I feel the desire to Justify as The Justifier Character, that I have applied Self Forgiveness and stated my Commitments and that I have to walk this Correction in and as The Physical because this is what we are doing, rewriting our Code of behavior into a Living Code, into something that we wish to see in this world as The Change we are "Hoping" for, take as many breaths as I need before I speak and step into justifications and instead take responsibility for everything I do and whenever I make a miss-take stand up again to Self Correct myself until I have realigned myself to Oneness and Equality and What is best for All

Related articles

• Day 81: Justifications Character
• Day 82: Justifications Character Self Forgiveness Statements

Day 122: Stopping the Slavery of the Debt System

Breathe and Stop (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When and as I see myself moving or about to move into one of my Hopelessness Characters, such as the Indignation Character or the FuckItAll Character, I stop, Breathe, remind myself that this is NOT how I will Change myself, as All the Characters born of Hopelessness as FEAR are in fact Powerless as they have already accepted and allowed themselves to believe that there is no Hope for us as Humanity because we will never Change and they exist to find evidence that this is in fact so to protect their existence in and as The Mind, instead I Breathe and tell myself 'it's just a Character, with no substance, unless I give it substance through my thoughts, feelings and emotions' and so I won't, I direct myself to not participate as a Slave to my Mind into the Play titled 'Why Humans Cant' Change" as that play is just about Me and the excuses about why I don't Change and so it is Me who has to STOP, Stand and Change into and as The Physical for myself and What is best for All

I commit myself to stop my justifications and my existence within Characters that have so many reasons why I can't Change and just push myself to Change, without bashing myself when I see I have done it again, whatever it is that I do as in following thoughts, feelings and emotions of myself as The Mind in a endless not-so-merry go round, and I push myself to Stop, to gain terrain and space for myself as Breath within the amazing maze of My Characters and Personalities, until I become more and more consistent in being Here in and as Breath

When and as I see myself desiring to take a baseball bat and walk out the door to go to smash it all because I have allowed myself to react and get angry, as the Self Righteous Character, BeLieving that I am not in fact part of the Problem just because I am walking a process of Self Correction which makes me better than others and entitles me to Blame Others for Not doing the same, I stop Breathe, tell myself that my Self Righteous Character leads to my Hoooligan Character and both have never amounted to nothing, nor have they ever changed anything if not the relationships around me for the worse, and that it is pointless to direct the anger that I feel for myself, for Not Standing Absolute as The Change that is in fact required to Change the Inward and Outward reality, onto others as the reflection of Me being absolutely angry at myself for having enslaved myself to and as Me as the Mind while I found ways as Characters to not stand up in and self responsibility, instead I forgive myself for having participated in Anger as Me, and Stand Up Again and Again, in and as Breath, reminding myself that debts are over when I decide, because I am the One that decides, and that I have made the decision to Stop my existence as a Debt/Credit System and  now I just have to walk it consistently to stop the Slavery of myself to the Perceived Debts of my Life that I have not yet let go but I can let go as I identify them through Self Forgiveness, Self Correction and Self Directive Application

I commit myself to stop existing as Anger in separation from this System as myself as I see realize and understand that until I am separated from The System as myself I cannot Change or stand as a Piece of The Solution, instead I breathe through the points of The System that I become aware of as I walk my Breath by Breath process to stop the enslavement of myself to the Mind and to the Slavery/Debt system of this world, One and Equal to me

When and as I see myself becoming overwhelmed as I see how extensive is the Slavery we have subjected ourselves to through a new point that I show myself, I stop, Breathe, remind myself that it is not to blame or judge this point as I see realize and understand we are walking the Con-sequences of what we have set in motion as a Life of Cons as the Lies we started to Create as Characters within a sequence in Time that we have layered ourselves with and we can STOP, because we were the Ones Creating such Cons and as the Con Artists we have become we can step out of the Cunning/Conning Characters to walk ourselves as Self Correction out of The Mind for ourselves and All of Existence Equal and One

I commit myself to stop conning myself in cunning ways from one Character into another which leads me into the Character of 'I'm fucking overwhelmed here' as I see realize and understand that that is just another Character that I have created to justify Why I experience myself in certain ways so I don't have to take responsbility as the Creator of my experience, instead I push myself to walk consistently to stop my participation in and as The Mind so I can gain stability as I walk in and as Breath my Self Correction to realign myself to Oneness and Equality and What is best for All

When and as I see myself thinking about Slavery as 'The Way things are' I stop, Breathe, remind myself that what I am seeing reflected in the world is My Own Slavery to Myself as The Mind, and so I stop, participating in and as The Mind to stop the Slavery of myself and Existence Equal and One

I commit myself to stop being a Slave to the Mind, to give importance to what the Mind whispers or comes up with to entice/tempt me to just walk back into the familiar terrain of my Thoughts, Feelings and Emotions without which I fear I don't exist as I have embraced the thought and the BeLief "I think therefore I am', and con-sequently prized my thought as an achievement of my beingness as a Mind System, while I see realize and understand that when I think I am The Mind and that's about it, a conglomerate of Schizofrenic Characters fighting for their own survival, using me as the Slave to provide and fuel the Mind, robbing me of my resources, as my Substance as The Physcal, cunning me with lies into believing that everything is under control, no more and no less than the absolute untrustworthy Outward World we have created and conned ourselves into and that we are now walking to leave behind for Life, for ourselves and All of Existence Equal and One .

When and as I see myself looking for external reasons to justify Why this System of debts exists in the first place, I stop, breathe, remind myself that WE ARE The System of Debt and that there is no Need to look outside as this System exists with the acceptance and allowance of All of Us, as we chose to believe that this was how the System worked and to not make waves but instead to carve out of the system our Place in The Sun, without seeing or realizing that if some take ALL the Place under the Sun and Justify it as Their Right as they are the Elite as the ELight of Existence and we believe and accept it is in fact so, why would we All have any less responsibility than the Con Artists that were more skilled than we were in making up bigger and better lies than the ones we came up with to abuse ourselves and existence, including the lie that Yes it was true that it was their Right, as Our Parents taught us that 'This is The Way Things Are' and to not question the sanity of our parents in FEAR to find out that we were just as crazy, we accepted The System, and then defended it as to WHY I Have the Right to have More Rights than Another that apparently doesn't have the Right to eat every day like I do, and since I am the One that decides I made my bed and then Lied in it, ending up Not Having The Right to Life as I denied it to others, because I failed to see that there was never any choice but One Choice -as All other choices create Con-sequences as a Debt to be walked- to do to others what I would like done unto me, and until we stand as One doing just that, we'll have to Lie together in the beds we made for others that we Hoped we would not have to Lie in, One and Equal to our Creation and The Rights We Granted to Others

I commit myself to eradicate from myself the Right to Inequality that I have breathed into Existence as I stand as the Righting of the Wrongs we set in motion within our Fears and Separation, claiming that we had More Right to Life than Everyone Else, instead of standing as One for All Life and Existence, Equal and One

I commit myself to show others in Common Sense, why what we have built and breathed into existence is an abomination and a Crime against Life as we have denied access to Life giving resources such as Money to 1/3 of the World, pretending it was an Economics problem that was disconnected from us and not in fact our response-ability and to show why and how the implementation of an Equal Money System is the Grace that will save us from our Damn-Nation, a place in which we believed we could be prized, valuable VIP Citizens of our Mind while we told the rest of the world to fuck off and die

I commit myself to show others that an Equal Money System is not in fact about Money, but it's about accessing an existing Tool that we have used and invested with the Power to decide who lives and who dies for What is Best for All, using THE Life resource that we have placed above Life, to return Life to an Equal Worth and Value, so that we may stop being con-fused about How we have to go about building The World, as Life at the Centre of every Equation will show us how to do that and we will be able to correct every Field of Existence and return it to the Sovereignty of Life, for Life and All of existence Equal and One

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Day 120: I am Awake - Not A Wake

When and as I see myself desiring to take a nap, to oversleep, to just close my eyes and not be Here, I stop, Breathe, remind myself that I can only be Awake or A Wake, waiting for My Death as The Solution instead of seeing and realizing that I am The Solution when I am Awake and Not A Wake

I commit myself to not give in to the desire to sleep when I am not in fact physically tired as I change my routine to sleep my 6 hours every night and stop indulging in sleep as a reward that only keeps me looping into the Mind as the "Wake me up when it's All Over Character”

When and as I see myself trying to stay in my zombie sleepy state going to the toilet so I can return to bed telling myself I was half asleep, I stop, Breathe, tell myself that if I am half asleep I must be half awake as well and stand as the directive principle to get going without indulging in sleep that I do not need

I commit myself to sleep six hours per night and then get up and get moving as the directive principle of me and not as a Mind System that has to wait to move until the Mind says go, I commit myself to not be dependent on my mind when sleep is involved but to check if I am physically tired or if I am just looking for a Mind Break to not be Here and face a point, a moment that needs my attention so I can see who I am within that moment and how I wrote myself to be that 'Who I am' within that moment to Self Correct to realign myself to Oneness and Equality and What is Best for All.

When and as I see myself coming up with excuses about why I 'deserve ' to rest, as if rest was not a physical moment of rest but something I have earned after doing something else that I myself judged as cumbersome, I stop, Breathe, look at what I have defined as cumbersome so I can remove that judgement through Self Forgiveness as I realize it is me defining everything in my life within polarities and I see it as an opportunity to find a point of judgment and definition to release myself from it

I commit myself to stop the judgments and definitions of my activities and the division in easy and cumbersome, fun and boring, exciting and a drag, as those definitions invite/push me within the 'Wake Me up when It's All Over' Character as I desire to reward myself for something I myself judged as cumbersome, boring, a drag, or whatever other negative charged definition I have placed on a task that I then desire to balance out with the positively charged 'napping time', and within this I forgive myself for charging the ‘napping time’ positively and remove that charge for good as I define napping time as NT necessary, not positive or negative, unless required by my body.

When and as I see myself coming up with excuses and justifications about why a nap is actually due, I stop, Breathe, see that it's another of one of my clever mindfuck with which I hope to find the right excuse to drift away, to not be Here and so stopping dreading to Be Here as the polarity of the ex positively charged napping time is rewarded and within this I forgive myself for having labeled, defined, thought of, spoken of, being Here as being Aware as something I do not like to do from which I found thousands of escaping routes, just because being Here was not providing the Energetic fix I have grown accustomed to and defined Life, instead I see and realize that I am just getting used to myself as Self expression that is not motivated or pushed around by Energy and that there is nothing More of Me and Nothing More of Here to look for, because Me Here in and as Breath is All There IS.

I commit myself to embrace myself and my self expression as being Here in and as Breath outside of Energetic movements and push overs so I can come to know myself and who I am as Self Expression as Life, for What is Best for All for myself and All of Existence, Equal and One 

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