I have not been able to share Self Forgiveness in Italian comfortably so far. I imagine people laughing and then gossiping about me as someone who belongs in the nut house.
Self forgiveness is linked to Forgiveness for me in Italian, a religious tool, Images of nuns and priests come up, of hell and crucifixion, of wrongdoings and fanatic stances of the religious people like Savonarola.
Religion never seemed sane, preaching one thing and doing another, so fear of inconsistency, of myself not being an example 'good enough' to even talk about it.
And it brings up a fear, like it is something not to be shared, even though I benefited a lot from using it to release my energetic ties, it's best left 'unspoken' so I will unfold this point both in English and in Italian in this post.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to resist sharing self forgiveness out of the fear of being judged as a nutcase
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that self forgiveness could be preached only by Holy People and since I am unholy I can't talk about it
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to link self forgiveness and preaching into one word
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that self forgiveness should be taught by those who live a life of renunciation like St. Francis of Assisi and not by common humans who have no business in 'religious practices'
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to link 'self forgiveness' to religion because forgiveness is a religious practice and only religious people do it and I am not religious
I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the contamination of the word -for-giveness was deliberate to make sure we would not be able to find the way out of the energetic loops we weaved for ourselves and for not pushing myself to break this conditioning and release myself from this religious baggage relative to the word 'forgiveness' -I forgive myself
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to, when faced today with a point where clearly a lady needed to learn this tool to stop herself from running wild within her mind, to react, and blame her for repeating the same old same old patterns that lead her to depression, instead of breathing and realizing she has no tool to stop herself, unless I share what I myself realized about how to stop a pattern of behavior/energy
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to scare this lady today about what kind of future is waiting for her if she doesn't stop 'that thing she does' which brings hell to herself and those around her, instead of breathing and seeing that there is never a good reason to scare someone into doing/not doing something, whatever points I can find to defend, I am in fact adding up to their own fears which constitute the building blocks of their mind loops and not supporting in any way
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to be part of the problem by projecting fears of possible future events vs being part of the solution by sharing self forgiveness and supporting another as myself to stop energetic patterns as their imprisonment and the hellish life they are currently experiencing
Self forgiveness is linked to Forgiveness for me in Italian, a religious tool, Images of nuns and priests come up, of hell and crucifixion, of wrongdoings and fanatic stances of the religious people like Savonarola.
Religion never seemed sane, preaching one thing and doing another, so fear of inconsistency, of myself not being an example 'good enough' to even talk about it.
And it brings up a fear, like it is something not to be shared, even though I benefited a lot from using it to release my energetic ties, it's best left 'unspoken' so I will unfold this point both in English and in Italian in this post.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to resist sharing self forgiveness out of the fear of being judged as a nutcase
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that self forgiveness could be preached only by Holy People and since I am unholy I can't talk about it
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to link self forgiveness and preaching into one word
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that self forgiveness should be taught by those who live a life of renunciation like St. Francis of Assisi and not by common humans who have no business in 'religious practices'
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to link 'self forgiveness' to religion because forgiveness is a religious practice and only religious people do it and I am not religious
I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the contamination of the word -for-giveness was deliberate to make sure we would not be able to find the way out of the energetic loops we weaved for ourselves and for not pushing myself to break this conditioning and release myself from this religious baggage relative to the word 'forgiveness' -I forgive myself
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to, when faced today with a point where clearly a lady needed to learn this tool to stop herself from running wild within her mind, to react, and blame her for repeating the same old same old patterns that lead her to depression, instead of breathing and realizing she has no tool to stop herself, unless I share what I myself realized about how to stop a pattern of behavior/energy
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to scare this lady today about what kind of future is waiting for her if she doesn't stop 'that thing she does' which brings hell to herself and those around her, instead of breathing and seeing that there is never a good reason to scare someone into doing/not doing something, whatever points I can find to defend, I am in fact adding up to their own fears which constitute the building blocks of their mind loops and not supporting in any way
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to be part of the problem by projecting fears of possible future events vs being part of the solution by sharing self forgiveness and supporting another as myself to stop energetic patterns as their imprisonment and the hellish life they are currently experiencing
Mi perdono per avere accettato e consentito a me stessa di avere paura di condividere 'il perdono di se stessi' perche' ho accettato e consentito a me stessa di credere che solo le persone religiose possono parlare di perdono e che non e' una cosa da condividere con altri
Mi perdono di avere accettato e consentito a me stessa di reagire con A. e di dirle tutto quello che ho detto partendo da una reazione, invece di respirare, rendere me stessa stabile e presente e poi scegliere le parole che avrei potuto dire che lei avrebbe potuto sentire, senza spaventarla
Mi perdono di avere accettato e consentito a me stessa di credere che ci sono buone ragioni per spaventare qualcuno per farlo uscire da un pattern, quando infatti e' la somma delle sue paure che la/lo tiene bloccata/o all'interno di un cerchio che continua a ripetersi senza uscita
Mi perdono per avere accettato e consentito a me stessa di resistere la condivisione del 'perdono di se' stessi' con la scusa che non avrebbe sentito/capito quello che volevo dire e che avrebbe potuto pensare che sono matta invece di realizzare che avevo paura di condividere questo strumento perche' ho permesso e consentito a me stessa di legare la parola 'perdono' alla religione, agli errori, all'inferno, alla crocefissione, a Suor Chiarina in piedi sulla cattedra che spiegava come hanno crocefisso Gesu', invece di realizzare che la parola perdono e' stata deliberatamente imbastardita dalla religione che l'ha strumentalizzata per se' e i propri scopi
Mi perdono per avere accettato e consentito a me stessa di non realizzare che la parola 'perdono' e' stata deliberatemente investita di un bagaglio religioso per allontanarla dall'uso della persona comune, per creare un senso di disagio che assicurasse che nessuno trovasse la strada fuori da questa esistenza delirante di pensieri, emozioni e sentimenti = energia
Mi perdono per avere accettato e consentito a me stessa di, quando ho condiviso questo strumento a supporto di qualcuno che non e' parte della mia famiglia, di sentire una gran paura e di credere che questa paura fosse giustificata perche' proietto sugli altri dei buoni motivi quale causa delle mie paure, invece di realizzare che le mie paure sono una mia creazione e che gli altri non hanno nulla a che vedere con come io percepisco me stessa
Mi perdono di avere accettato e consentito a me stessa di credere che la parola perdono non possa esistere fuori da club/associazioni religiosi, e che usare una parola come perdono mi rende uguale ai gruppi come CL, ai boy scout, al catechismo, a gruppi che in passato ho giudicato come noiosi e non interessanti e che ora temo possano essere associati a me insieme al giudizio che ho espresso su di loro, per il quale mi perdono
Desteni - Learn about Self Forgiveness here - Impara a perdonare te Stesso Qui.
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