Showing posts with label World News. Show all posts
Showing posts with label World News. Show all posts

Friday, November 30, 2012

Day 204: Powerlessness as Abdication of Responsibility



Everything that is going on in the News and Italian talks show these days is about ILVA, the Infamous Steel Manufacturer.
One of the workers interviewed today, after the Plant closed down again due to the Never-seen-before-Tornado, was that 'unless we stop delegating and allow others to decide for our future things won't change'.

We can take this statement to the bigger and see that while there has been a lot of advantage in this unfair race for Money and Profit by those that were the holders of Money as Power, the responsibility cannot be only on the hands of the perpetrators of Abuse. What about the Abused?
If we had stood together for what is Best for ALL, Abuse would have Never Been Possible.
Instead we are fragmented, first within our Minds and then without, resulting in this World of separation, where My interests must come before Yours, where I live and you die.

So, the truth about admitting to be powerless, fearing to be powerless hides the desire to not take responsibility and to blame others for where we find ourselves today, making the consequences of our participation the testimony of the one way responsibility that we abdicated in blame, instead of stopping and reassessing where is our Response-Ability in the face of Abuse and how can we find solutions for All of Us, stopping this world, changing what we ask just for ourselves into designing a Change for everyone as ourselves and then we as the system, change to a system of Self responsibility, where each is responsible for self as the whole and within our self Response-Ability we can find again the Power we have abdicated happy to be abused as long as we wouldn't have to face the point that this World would have never be possible without our acceptance and allowance and as such, as we Change our acceptance and allowance into a Self Directive decision to Stand for Life and All Living beings, so does the World as our Mirror, change with us.



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from power as mySelf as Self responsibility

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear standing up because I feared having to face the truth that at this moment I have no power to change the world or any impact on the system and I won't either until I hold myself in separation from the system as myself

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to fear becoming responsible, fearing the LOAD of the responsibility that I perceive is not possible to be faced by just one, instead of seeing the solution that 1 + 1 means I am not alone, even though I walk alone the process of stopping the separation of myself from the system as me

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that the Rich and Powerful will always win because I wished to not have to stand up as part of the Solution and I could if I gave up before I even started by blaming the Rich and Powerful for where we are today

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to live as friction and Conflict against this system within my Mind for so long that I came to the 'I give up' point, feeling that it's hopeless to even believe we can change something that has become so big and has taken over control, instead of seeing and realizing that as each one takes over control of themselves as One of the Whole, the system must change, because the system is nothing more than the sum of its parts

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that this world is a collective creation and as such, collectively, united, we can change what we created in separation to reflect our change as realignment to Oneness and Equality

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that stopping to vote is taking a stand, when stopping to vote is what is one of the points that is manifesting the problems we are facing, as we don't stand up to Vote as Self responsible Human beings for something else, such as a system that works for All and considers All Living Beings as Equals

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to fear Equality because I yearned to be special and more than others, not wanting to be common as I defined 'common' as the flattening of all self expression, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding, that only when we will be truly Equals we will have the freedom to self express, beyond fears and judgements

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to see the rich and powerful as 'the ones at fault' because they have more 'numbers' that could in a swift move make this change happen if they only wanted, instead of accepting the fact that they don't want, for now, just as much as I didn't want to give up my 'status' for equality and as such others like me who are still stuck in the brainwashing of finding value in their position and possessions are not in a position to make this move and that furthermore the desire for 'them' to make such move is yet again another abdication of responsibility in which I wonder and keep myself pre-occupied with questions such as 'why does this change have to start with me and not with 'them', why aren't THEY asked to change, why aren't They giving the example?", failing to see that I ask myself such questions looking for ways to keep abdicating my responsibility, seeking for Good reasons why I can still postpone because the ones who are creating the most damage -apparently- are still busy doing it, when in fact we are all equally participating collectively in the Creation of this world and as such we have to collectively disengage this support that we are giving through the abdication of our responsibility for this world as ourselves

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to be moved by the anger of the people manifesting against this system, as being 'moved' means I am not Here, stable in and as Breath, instead of seeing and realizing the anger as real and valid without participating in it as I see, realize and understand that the anger we are using to moan about the system is misdirected, we are all angry at ourselves for what we have accepted and allowed, then, best stop diversions, own the anger and on the wings of this self honest Anger, stand for a Change, as the Change that we want to see in this world, for ourselves and all of Existence, Equal and One.


When and as I see fears coming up in me about how pointless it is to stand up given the extent of the problem we are facing, I stop, breathe, make a point of getting back Here through breathing as my 'thoughts' are not the solution to this world problem as they only exist of polarity that I use to find ways to be against the system as that gives me the momentary relief of the belief 'that I am doing something about it, I am opposing it!", when in fact I am just perpetuating the friction and conflict I exist as which is what is manifesting the friction and conflict that stand in the way of One Solution for the World that will benefit All Equally


When and as I see myself desiring to blame the Rich and Powerful for how we live, I stop and breathe, as I see realize and understand the Rich and Powerful are nothing else than manifestations of my own desire for moreness in fear of being less and that when I equalize myself to be stable within who I am I will be one less point of support for the Inequality of this world

When and as I see myself fearing that nothing will change, I look into the specific point I am facing to see why and what I am not willing to change about myself and why I accept the limitations of myself which reflect in the limited version of the world we live in and stand to address that point and change it





I commit myself to not give in to thoughts of assessment of the gravity of the system situation as that is already clear to me but instead to become more consistent in breathing myself back into the physical and Not participate within and as the Mind of thoughts, feelings and emotions as an excuse to tap into Powerlessness so I can abdicate my responsibility for standing for change as the change


I commit myself to, whenever I perceive myself toying with thoughts and feelings of powerlessness to STOP, breathe and bring muself back to Breath while I look at what I am trying to Not take responsibility for, so I can address it in writing and self corrective application until I stand Self responsible and no longer Powerlessness as a victim of my self created Mind.

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Thursday, September 27, 2012

Day 155: Can we be done with the 'Bad News' already? Character




I'm experiencing resistance to reading the news, I'm tired of bad news and I can't seem to find the Good news anymore, where did they go?

Since I started to walk with Desteni and my world took a 360 degree turn I went from the happy go lucky stoned positive thinker to reading daily the World News with a grave heart.

I don't enjoy it one bit.

Some days, like these days, I experience myself as just wanting to say 'Enough already, I had enough, get me some cute stories about mommy bears and teddy bears because 'everyone needs a break now and then', how are we supposed to function within all 'this negativity' ?

This is my backchat, the one I want to suppress because really, is the world stopping the 'bad news' just because we stop reading them?

And Why do I experience myself this way if not because I have just moved polarity, from the carefree 'devilmaycare' attitude to the Character " I have to become Responsible = which I equate with boring and depressed, deep people are like that, never a dull moment or a moment of breath"


Funny because what we ALWAYS talk about within Desteni is Breath, Breathe, Breathing, but I'm too busy being responsible and deep for that, I have to raise my eyebrow and tut tut at the World and what is happening everywhere, this is what responsible people do, they struggle, they realize Life is a Bitch and then you Die.

So, how do I redefine this word 'responsible' so as to not be a Character that I drag around and drags me around until I get to the 'Enough Already' and desire to go on a binge of some kind to 'take a break'?





I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define being 'responsible' as being boring, a drag, a party pooper, someone in touch with the 'negative' part of he world and someone whose company is Not desirable

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to be responsible as a Duty, as a Character I embody through all the definitions I gave to responsibility, as being dull, annoying, and ultimately just a drag nobody can live with consistently, because then I should 'shoot myself'

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that I would rather shoot myself than live as a responsible being forever, within my own definition of responsibility as always looking at the 'negative, dull, boring, experiencing only the 'sad' side of existence just to make a point with others, to show them how deep I truly am that I can take on me such a Character and embody it for What is Best for All

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react when reading some blogs always hammering this fucking responsibility point as something sublime we should aspire to as the ultimate purpose for living, when I in fact experience this responsibility as a drag, obnoxious, dull and essentially negative experience

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that Change can take place only within responsibility and that responsibility is not a Character but me as a response-able being

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place a negative charge on the word 'responsibility' so I would make sure never to be 'attracted' by it but to flee it at any possible given chance

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that it is my responsibility to feel the negativity of the world as my own experience because this proves that I am not shallow and disconnected from reality but I am into it as deep as I could be, drowning in it until I perceive everything around me as my own experience of existence being shitty and negative

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have a timer that goes off when I tell myself 'enough already' as I experience myself within uncomfortability, blaming my experience of uncomfortability on Life and what is going on out there since I never get to read some 'good news' about this world or Reality, instead of seeing and realizing my experience of myself is not determined by what is happening outward but what is happening inward

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be too busy with negative/bad news to make myself responsible to breathe, because who has time to breathe and get lost in such a menial task such as breathing when I am so busy getting involved with world event and categorizing them as negative, negative, negative, until I can't take it anymore

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define world events as negative and placing a negative charge on them according to how I feel when I read the news and when I feel bad/negative I justify myself that 'how else could I feel reading such news' because I still value how I feel as a way to define myself as alive and on what side of the divide I stand, with the positive thinkers or the negative readers of negative news?

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react with a knot in my stomach when I read about violence, abuses, war, poverty, rape, because I believe that unless I feel bad and knot up I am No Good

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that being responsible means accepting to feel bad in opposition to my suppressed desire to feel good that I have honed and cultivated for most of my life and I have not yet completely released

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define a 'good life' as 'feeling good and having good experiences' instead of defining life as what is best for all at all times

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that unless I feel bad I am not responsible, instead of seeing and realizing and understanding that my responsibility toward life is to stop my existence as the Mind as that's where I live out my separation and self interest toward everything that exists

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect responsibility ad blame and since I am no longer blaming others for this world I am left with blaming myself which leads to my experience of the negative emotion of blame, which is still a Mind Job that I am doing because I have not yet accepted that Life is not defined by feeling ad emotions but by my being Here in and as Breath and not lost in my Mind

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel bad because I am consulting a company where someone is possibly stealing and I am battling with my desire to be good and not give the advice to get rid of them because this is bad news and I would like to not contribute to the bad news of this world so I can be good

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to lie in bed obsessed with what is the best advice to give to this company, where I can see myself coming out clean out of the unpleasant deed of having to speak what I see that is not what is best for all, because someone who is abusing their partners out of their good faith should be banned from the company so he may have some time to rethink if abuse is how he wants to live by

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to dislike banning, unfriending and firing people even when the abuse is clear, because I hate being the bringer of bad news because I desire to be good and I equate bad news and me as the bringer of bad news as not being good

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think and believe that unless I lie in bed in total stress playing out all the possible scenarios I won't be able to address a business decision responsibly in the moment because I don't trust myself to be able to speak what is best for all without first 'thinking about it'

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am responsible for the consequences of another, instead of seeing and realizing I am responsible for how I participate within this reality and if I stand to speak out the consequences one has woven out for themselves I am not being irresponsible because I did not consider his family and how he will support himself but he has been irresponsible by not thinking about his family and how he will support himself when he stole and did what he did within his mandate of responsibilities

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to accumulate the stress relative to what is going on with me that I perceive as negative, because I believe that if I experience something negative, I am negative as in bad, because this is what I believed when I was a positive thinkers about the responsible party poopers such as I see myself in this moment, and I don't want to write about my 'negativity'

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to blame how I feel on the news, on this business consultation that I am giving that may have a 'negative' outcome as the source of how I experience myself instead of correcting all my self definitions of what it is that I believe is making me experience myself in this way until I go back to being stable in and as Breath

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not want to write about this point because I told myself I would write about it when I am resolved about it, instead of seeing and realizing I cannot resolve anything until I am reacting and I am obviously reacting to having to give a business advice because I have started to judge business advices that may lead to someone losing their job as negative and bad

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel negative about this business advice because, since I am not paid for it, I don't see it as my responsibility to give the best advice but I see it as what is best for me to do, considering nobody is rewarding me for taking on such a shitty position as the one that speaks the truth about a simple business operation such as this one is, such as 'people who steal from their partners and screw up all papers to cover their tracks and have not considered that what they stole they stole it from other 3 people who have families too to support and go tight every month so the stealing partner can splurge and live above his wage, should be fired' - period

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to polarize my existence into good and bad, into feeling and emotions, accepting and allowing myself to believe that it is 'normal' to feel a certain way when something that is objectively negative takes place, instead of seeing and realizing that within this existence there is nothing objective taking place but just myself experiencing the polarity of my mind which I am stopping and self correcting through writing, self forgiveness and self corrective application, to realign with Oneness and Equality and What is best for All.

Self commitments to follow tomorrow



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