I realized that within me be-lieving to be a 'Seductress' there is a point of value and a belief that men are indeed stupid and not Equal, that women can seduce them while they are foolishly following the lead, the hook, instead of recognizing the Equality of the games we play where I enjoy thinking I seduce them as a point of power/worth while they enjoy thinking that they seduced me as a point of power/worth.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that it was all my doing what happened between me and men instead of seeing they are equally participating in the seduction game
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be willing to carry the fault/blame for myself as a point of value because within that blame/fault I make myself more powerful than men and turn them into fools at my mercy
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself for the personality play of the seductress because within that blame there was 'my power to seduce', making myself more than men within the seduction game and finding value/worth for myself within being more
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not want to see the Equality of the Games we play because then I would have to feel as duped as the super duper I like to believe I am
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself and judge myself as the sole participant of the seduction game, in which I found my power and value, being 'more evil' than men
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear men and the games they play as much as I feared myself and the games I played
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that if a man plays his game well I will be duped and won't be able to say NO, because within the games men play there is the game of giving me value and 'making me feel special' since I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I'm worthless, I fear I cannot resist the value game
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that when someone 'makes me feel special' I can't resist their attention as I have accepted and allowed to build myself into a value/worth seeking machine while I separated myself from Self as Self Worth and Self Value
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear men instead of seeing I was fearing myself and what I was willing to do in my search for worth and value
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to turn my fear of men, which was the fear of myself, into a desire to belittle them so I can feel in charge and in control and less vulnerable to the value/worth game
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that since my worth lies into being attractive for men I have to fear my not being attractive to them and it's better to fatten myself up and put myself aside of the game instead of seeing I am facing the fear of aging and not having the same pulling power and feedback from men
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear aging as a point in which I will lose my ability to pull and manipulate men to me, instead of seeing I was never the one who pulled men but I was a loser in the moment I stepped into the worth/value games as seduction, we both play equally
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe 'I could have any man I wanted' without realizing that within the current system pretty much any woman can, as SEX is the name of the Game and it's not personal
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to be special, because within that specialness I found my worth and value given that if I am special I am above and beyond other women and I have won the game of comparison and competition for the prize which is sex
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make SEX into the Price/prize I have to pay for playing the seduction game as a way to give myself worth/value
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that SEX is something I have to give in return for the 'devotion' men show to me which is nothing more than their desire to have sex, because Sex was The Design and The Price/prize we were both after
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel ashamed for the sex I have had as a way to payback and lever the expectations I built in men through my seduction games because I turned seduction into a promise that would have to be paid back when the games I participated in were creating 'too much credits'
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself for the seduction games in which I participated instead of seeing I have designed myself to be seductive as a way to survive within this world in fear that if I couldn't 'promise' sex as a way of life as who I am, my life would not be safe, and I would not have access to the world system in which the name of the game is Sex/Money
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use 'the promise of sex' as a compensation for the money I lacked, because since I did not have enough money/debts to consider myself 'safe' in the world I could accumulate sex/debts, without seeing that both money and sex debts are called to be paid back and I ended up feeling and seeing myself as the eternal debtor inside the world system of money/sex
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live in and as the Debt System of this world, hoping to create Credits through my seduction and promises for Sex, instead of seeing I was accumulating debts, through my own Self Judgements and Fears, supporting and allowing the existence of a system of Debts One and Equal to Me
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live and exist as Debt/Debts, I now For-Give my debts and the debts of the Ones around me regarding Sex and the Seduction games I/We played, One and Equal
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to support the existence of the current Money System of Debts because I myself existed in and as Debt, instead of giving what I would like to receive to myself and others, The For-Giveness of All Debts for a world that is What is Best for me and What is Best for All
When and as I see myself moving or about to move into the Seductress Personality, I stop, Breathe, look at why I am fearing that moment as a moment that needs my leverage as 'Seduction', Breathe, remind myself that I am Worth as Self Worth Here in Breath and that there is nothing I can gain from playing Energy/power/value games but Debts, because the Energy system is designed in and as a Debt System, and I can only STOP playing or accumulate Debts as there is no way to Win within a system of Debts, so I stop my participation in and as Debt to stop the creation of and as Debts of this world, One and Equal to Me
I commit myself to bring myself back Here with consistency, through Breath, leading myself out of my Mind consistently with patience as my Mind has been my only abode for my whole Life and I see that I fear leaving me as the Mind behind, yet I see that Fear is Not Real and just the way my Mind is resisting to be left behind, so I commit myself to become familiar with Life not in and as The Mind but Here in and as The Physical, where No debts are Created, but Breaths of and as Life are accumulated for myself and all of existence Equal and One
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